Saturday, October 16, 2004

You are so irresponsible...

I received 3 sms from the same person... each word I read cut deep... every word are resentful. My hands can't stop shivering... my mind was blank... tears uncontrollably fell.. heart's beating fast. I am hurted... very much... this is a very first time I'd received an angry comment.

Maybe he was right to be annoyed, but I don't see it as my fault. I wasn't not doing anything like what he said, in fact I have not been sleeping and have been toiling on and worrying about the game demo everyday. I have came out with the maze and the code to print, working halfway for the explosion effect... and trying hard to combine his code, which i can't even run, with mine...
I am not uninterested in the project... I really like Computer Game Programming, I just find it very tedious. In fact this is one of the projects in my entire NTU life that I'm so involved in... that I'd skipped so many lectures this semster for it.

So, I find it very unfair to say that I am not doing anything... that I am irresponsible and unreliable... that I'd gave him a false impression... that I am being unfair to him...

I sent him 6 sms to clarify... to say sorry for the distress I'd caused. I have to admit that I was to blame for not updating him and wasn't punctual in giving him my code... my reason is I wanted to finish my stuff, nice and presentable, to him. Yes, I am a perfectionist, so I really think that the things he had came out wasn't nice, though he was fast. Because he was fast, he seemed to have done many things, this will shame me if I handed him an incompleted code... I do not want to deny the work he'd done, so I suggested to 拆伙... if it would be fair to him.

This incident ended up with a break-up... we will do different game demo on our own. Which mean now, I only have 2 days to come out with a game with whatever I have...



[written on 19 Oct because was too occupied with work! sianz haven'tblog about bday yet =( ]

1 comment:

tree said...

Hey, I do not think it is very responsible or mature on his part to accuse you like that. In SMS somemore -- how cowardly it is not to have the courage to talk things thru' with you. I just feel that it is really childish to point-finger when a group project doesn't work out. It is team effort afterall. What I'm trying to say is that if you are gonna let this affect you, mess up your self-confidence, then rethink. Even with reasons like stress and miscommunication, he should never use such harsh words on you (and you on others too...hee!). Hope you are feeling better already. Let's talk soon. =)