To kill time...

Play games when I wasn't feeling right... Discovered this game from fasco-cs... unlike its crimson and viridian game which I spent so much time and brain juice to solve them.. this is so funny.. hahaha more fun to play with though it was quite stupid..

我有在成长吗?

铁磨铁 磨出刃来; 朋友相感也如此
痛悲羞 骄者勿服 忧伤之灵谁晓知?
愚昧呀! 明哲似远 懈怠的人难行義
忏悔着 恳切哀恕 泪淋持待主再归...

Anger...

I can't control it... so i run away from it, preventing myself from exploding... i do not understand why she kept finding fault with him.. why she just can't love him..? why she kept talk abt money? why she can't see her own fault...?

I dun hate her.. i'm just angry... of myself too.. i dunno what to do...

New Look...

Tadaa... .. my new blog look... I had done this when I was super pissed of PHP and was taking a break from it... duhz.. .. what a long break manz.. now back to the project..

Learning ...

Arrgg.. .. aarrrrgggggg.... it's so hard to learn php on my own... i spent the whole afternoon, yesterday, just to get myself to be connected to the database.. then the whole night to do the database and forms... and now i'm stuck..

Went to airport again...

yup.. went to send some people off today.. It was such a coincidence that both Grace and Charmain are leaving to Europe tonight and that their flights are just 10 mins apart from one another.. Nothing really special... cuz they are just going for 1 month... duhz..
Saw **n... and she told me mel's condition... that she's in NUH now.. lotsa memories really flashed back manz... and.. dunno why.. mel always have the ability to affect my emotions.. maybe i really do care for her.. yet.. there seem to be nothing i can do.. nahz.. i will be okay.

Before it's too late...

Finally we had came to the last session of JFN... today's teaching was quite fast, so Wee Seng spent the rest of the time challenging us to think of how we can act wisely... He also shared his regrets which i think is my regret too... that we all had spent too much of our time outside in Christian activities that we did not spend time to talk to our parents..

Now, like what he had shared, i had difficulty communicating with my parents... my conversation w my dad nowadays is less than 10 sentences.. i dun seem to know what to talk to him le... so i always ask him how's his day.. which is the same everyday... Maybe i need to do something to salvage the r'ship.. well.. think i shall start brushing up my Chinese chess during this holiday.. such that even i got nothing to say to him, we can still spend time tog... As for my mum, i think she is easier because she talks a lot.. so just let her talk.. and mi 'listen' loz..

Stranger in the lift...

The person rushed into the lift out of nowhere.. then started asking me questions.. i shouldn't have answered him... i should be more alert.. I should have suspected something when he said he's visiting a fren at this hour of time (going midnight)... now dunno whether he know which unit i stay or not.. so scary.. unable to sleep.. hoped that he is not a stalker and that i am too sensitive...

I was too inconfident...

After 4 years of computer engineering, i'm still not confident of working for people... My first job offered to do a 3 months project in NUS was blown off because i was overwhelmed by the allowance given... it can round up to 10k for 3 months... the money is so big and the project sounded difficult.. hence i was really afraid that i can't do it, even with help... In the end.. i lost it.. I felt so disappointed thereafter and started to wonder if I can ever find a job or not.. what kind of work can i do..?

Telling gospel in Chinese...

Arg... how come i can't present the gospel well in Chinese when i'm a Chinese...? I was so disappointed of myself.. really feel that i can do it better.. It was such a rare chance that i could talk to my tuition's kid's mum today and our conversation actually opened up a chance for me to share the gospel... But Chinese sentences just didn't formed well in my brain to describe the good news...

nahz.. so i'd only manage to drive thru the point that all of us is sinful, and only God can forgive.. dunno she understand or not.. she always told me that Christianity is good and wanted her child to go to church but she cannot believe in Christ because if so, no one will worship their ancestors.. well.. i'd continue to pray for her..

Happy Mother's Day...

aksjdhjfd

Sis insisted me to take a picture of myself with the dish i'd done for mum for mother's day... well.. since i wasn't a cook by nature.. and this fish dish was really tedious.. so felt really good when all who ate complimented..

Yes.. All is really over now...

I was so nervous for my presentation this morning, that as i walked into the tutorial room, i chased out the two guys in the tutorial rm... think one of them was annoyed by my this behavior.. haiz...

nevertheless the presentation went alright.. i wasn't fully prepared.. and i think the examiners knew that too.. now just hope that i can pass lahz...

So, when everything is over.. i went to treat myself some fish and chips in the new cafe in NTU BSci block... it was quite good.. happy!

Brought my camera then.. thinking of taking pics with my supervisor.. but forgot after the presentation.. so mi and a** and yongjie went around the school to take pics.. hahaha.. though it's kinda stupid.. but duhz.. it's fun.. really fun...

Exams are over... for good...

Yipppeee...... Exams are over.... completely over... hope that i will not have take anymore exams in the near future.. I was so excited, or rather so 'gan choi' and stressed, that i can't sleep the last night.. i was awaked throughout the night... and then relied on vitamins, chicken essence and plenty of coffee to keep me awake... now that my exams are over, i wished to sleep.. but i can't cuz i haven't prepare for my FYP presentation yet which is tomorrow's morning... nahz.. but the stress can't keep me awake.. slept in the library while doing the slides.. zzz.. thanks to Yongjie.. for waking me up.. and discipline me to finish the slides.. before we headed down to the airport...

Yes.. airport... to send Minna off.. i am going to miss u Minna...

gotta quite high.. maybe due to insufficient rest plus overdose of caffeine in my body.. also because i was hanging out the usual groups of comfortable friends that i loved to be with.. so crapped a lot... how i wish life is so carefree everyday.. no stress but rest and play.. and hanging around w friends...

did i say no stresss...? oh no.. wake up gal..! gotta presentation tomolo morning ehz.. #$!&@.. =S

Last Examinations Paper...

Tomorrow I am going to take the last paper of my entire education life.. 恐怖的vision... (Computer Vision)... and that will mark the end of my 16 years of studying...

Ahh.. 好恐怖啊! sob.. i haven't finish studying yet.

Former-president Wee pass away...

Heard the news this evening... that our former-Prez Wee Kim Wee passed away this morning... the news made a special report on the bibliography of this dead person... and that was then I think he was quite a remarkable leader.. humble and sincere... He had a poverty-stricken childhood then started work at the age of 15 as a clerk, then, like Chris Chia, a journalist in Strait Times... then a diplomat before becoming our President in 1985. But what really caught me by surprise is that he was a God fearing leader... though i do not know if he believe in Jesus or not; but he did said this phrase in great humility.. "In the eyes of God, all man is the same.. if you take away the title of president from me, i am not different from the taxi driver..."

It was during the news report.. that i also realised that I know little of the leaders of Singapore.. though i lived in S'pore for more than 20 years... and i'd never prayed for them or thanks God for them... I was quite ashamed to have taken the peace and freedom in Singapore for granted without recognising that it was God who allows it... but who had recognised it?

Yes.. in the eyes of God, all man is the same because all man had sinned against God... and all man needs Jesus.