Thursday, December 23, 2004

Many things had happened...

Have not been blogging for 2 weeks... actually for 2 weeks.. many things happened.. many emotions... many thoughts... many things that i want to say it out.. yet many things to hide.. many things I had learnt.. on the other hand, many things i am unsured... many things that are confused... many things that i am inconfident in doing... many things that weighed me down..

I can't find time to blog them... and I can't find any words to pen down the thoughts and the feelings in me... I even tried to think of Chinese words... but what i can think of is 难以形容.... the more i tried to think... the more 辛苦 i am... like there is something very heavy in my heart...

Running away could be a good way... i realise i wanted to run away from many things but i know i can't... and i shouldn't.. but still i see me running... running away from my FYP project... from the FES matter... from church... from friends... from myself...

yes.. I am weak... I can't make firm decision.. I can't be sure of my project... I can't voice out the wrongs that I see... I can't understand many things... i can't stop thinking of evil... i am a sinner... yes i am a sinner.. and no one... no one except God can save... This is the only thing that i am sure of...

Hence, I dun need sympathy... because we are all in the same plight... Rather, teach me the word of God.. the power of salvation... help me to consider Christ... so that i can have my confidence in the Lord and not in my flesh... so that i may have the wisdom to deal with issues whilst still in the "now and not yet" .. I want to continue in learning God's Word.

2 comments:

taiyongchieh said...

*pAtPaT*
I'm encouraged by what you said. Keep on fighting and keep on growing. Let do this together.

Anonymous said...

hey sis! press on! the journey here on earth is hard, but, we're in it together. & the most impt part of the group is... JESUS & the Holy Spirit! we'll be able to go thru this... no matter how long the journey!!!